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Deciding to bring a little one into the world is huge. For some, it’s a straightforward path. For others—especially same-sex female couples—it’s a journey filled with obstacles, choices, and, let’s be honest, a whole lot of paperwork. Thankfully, reproductive technology has paved the way for more inclusive family-building options, and reciprocal in vitro fertilization (IVF) is one of the most empowering choices out there.
This method doesn’t just help same-sex couples have a baby—it lets both partners actively participate in the pregnancy. One provides the egg, the other carries the baby, and together, they share an incredible experience from start to finish. But before diving headfirst into this option, there’s one big question that always comes up: How much does reciprocal IVF cost?
Key Takeaways
- Reciprocal in vitro fertilization allows same-sex couples to both participate in a pregnancy - one by donating the egg and the other by carrying the pregnancy to term.
- Reciprocal IVF is a safe, effective form of assisted reproductive technology and is likely more consistently successful than traditional IVF.
- Reciprocal IVF, and all forms of IVF, can be expensive compared to other forms of ART. Whether the costs are worthwhile comes down to each couple’s needs and wants from a pregnancy.
What Is Reciprocal IVF?
Reciprocal IVF, also called co-IVF, is a fertility treatment designed for same-sex female couples who want to share the biological and physical aspects of pregnancy. One partner provides the eggs, while the other carries and gives birth to the baby. It’s a beautiful way for both partners to feel equally connected to the pregnancy journey.
This approach has gained popularity in recent years, especially because it often yields better success rates than traditional IVF. But just like regular IVF, it’s a multi-step process that requires careful planning, medical intervention, and a financial commitment.
How Does Reciprocal IVF Work?
The process is similar to conventional IVF, but with one key difference—both partners are directly involved. The entire process takes several weeks to months, depending on individual health factors and clinic protocols. Let’s break it down step by step.
Legal Considerations
Before starting, it’s crucial to sort out legal matters. Fertility laws vary from state to state, and when only one partner contributes genetic material, legal parentage can get tricky. Many clinics require couples to sign agreements clarifying parental rights before moving forward. Consulting an attorney who specializes in reproductive law can prevent any legal headaches down the line.
Deciding Roles
Some couples know right away who will donate the egg and who will carry the pregnancy. Others may need a little help making the decision. Medical evaluations can help determine fertility levels, but ultimately, the choice depends on what feels right for both partners.
If you’re unsure, fertility specialists—like those at Ivy Fertility—can guide you through this process. They’ll consider health factors, fertility potential, and personal preferences before helping you make the best decision.
Choosing a sperm donor
Reciprocal IVF requires donor sperm, and this is where things get interesting. Couples have two main options:
- Known Donor: A friend or family member donates sperm. It’s often more affordable but requires legal agreements regarding parental rights.
- Sperm Bank: An anonymous donor from a reputable sperm bank. This option allows couples to choose specific characteristics, but it can add $400–$2,000 to the cost.
Physical and mental evaluations
If not already done, the couple will go through various tests to check if they are ready for the process. The partner providing the eggs will go through a transvaginal ultrasound to check the ovaries and antral follicle count (AFC) and a blood test panel to analyze hormonal levels, including Anti-Müllerian hormone (AMH).
The gestational carrier will also go through blood tests to check their blood type and Rh factor, screening for STDs like chlamydia, gonorrhea, HIV, and hepatitis, as well as a physical exam, including a pelvic exam. Their family and medical history will also be reviewed.
Once the tests are done, our IVF specialists will then decide on the right treatment protocol for the couple. The donor partner (the one offering the eggs) will then be given medication to stimulate the ovaries to produce multiple eggs.
Retrieving the eggs
When the eggs are nearly mature, the donor partner receives a final hormone injection to prepare for retrieval. About 36 hours later, the eggs are collected using a thin needle guided by ultrasound. The procedure takes 15–45 minutes under anesthesia, followed by an hour of recovery time.
Fertilization
The retrieved eggs are fertilized with donor sperm. The healthiest sperm are selected, and a few eggs are fertilized while the rest can be frozen for future use.
Embryo Transfer
While the embryos develop in the lab, the gestational partner takes hormone treatments to prepare their uterus. Once ready, the embryo is transferred using a catheter. This step is quick, painless, and usually takes about 20 minutes.
Co-IVF Success Rate
Co-IVF often has higher success rates than traditional IVF. Why? Some studies have shown that many heterosexual couples pursue IVF due to fertility issues, whereas most same-sex female couples are using it as their only option for conception. That means there are typically fewer underlying fertility struggles involved, increasing the chances of a successful pregnancy.
Costs of Reciprocal IVF
The price tag is where things get real. On average:
- Initial IVF cycle: $20,000
- Subsequent IVF rounds: $3,000–$5,000 each
These numbers cover medications, egg retrieval, embryo transfer, legal fees, and donor sperm costs. But if your insurance plan includes fertility coverage, it could significantly lower out-of-pocket expenses.
It depends. Some insurance providers cover full IVF treatments, while others only cover specific parts (like hormone medications). Before starting, check with your provider to understand what’s covered and plan your finances accordingly.
Bottom Line
Reciprocal IVF is a game-changer for same-sex female couples who want to share the pregnancy journey. It’s an emotional, physical, and financial commitment—but for many, it’s worth every penny. With medical advancements making the process more successful than ever, this is an exciting time for LGBTQ+ family-building.
Before diving in, weigh the costs, legal considerations, and emotional aspects. Consult a reproductive specialist, explore financing options, and make sure you’re ready for the journey ahead. Because at the end of the day, this isn’t just about science—it’s about love, family, and the magic of bringing a child into the world together.